I held you long before my arms did, in my dreams and thoughts. I whispered to you the lullabies that would later send you off to sleep.
I knew you long before I met you, I would talk of your personality made up of elbows and knees, “ready to keep me on my toes”, I would say.
I loved you long before I saw you, tracing black and white prints of your lips, knowing soon enough I’d be kissing them with my own.
I heard you long before your cry into the world. That first heart beat, the one that echoed love and relief, a quick rhythm that made time slow down.
I wanted you long before I needed you, as I sat there willing tests to show me the lines that would change my life.
I felt you long before I touched you, the stretches of my belly proudly growing you. The pain that sometimes comes with being made of eachother, the worry, that I couldn’t be without you now.
I shared with you my heart before you’d steal it completely. I’ve shared stories, ones of how I met your father, books already sitting on your shelf. I’ve shared unspoken emotions with you that I know you can feel.
I’ve shared my body, I am your land and you are my guide.
When it’s dark at night I wonder, will it be tonight?
I’m nervous
There’s so much I don’t know.
But I know I love you.
I’m ready
when you are.
See you soon,
love, Mum.
Written for Dockatot
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