To The Parents With Highly Sensitive Little Ones
You’re perfect you know, I often watch you and think that with tears in my eyes.
I’m also filled with anxiety upon leaving the house sometimes, a path of eggshells laid out for me.
You are a fire that spits, that cracks, that can burn out from a heart so big.
I don’t always know what to do, sometimes I just sit and wait for you to calm down, wondering how I can be there for you both when your needs are so different.
I don’t want to contain you, I just want to help you.
I think back to you at 4 months old at the baby groups, I knew we were different.
I would wince at a balloon bobbing along waiting for the pop, waiting for you to be in hysterics, waiting for us to leave.
A motor bike or sirens up ahead.
A baby crying.
Someone unfamiliar looking at you.
I held my breath a lot.
You are so loving, I know everyone can see it, but wow I see it like it’s our secret.
If a sad melody comes on, tears will come and sometimes you ask me to turn the music off, sometimes you just sit with your head bowed and you listen and my heart breaks.
It’s a gift but it’s heavy, little one.
I’m unwrapping you to your core and I’m learning about me too.
Both of our unveiling.
You see things with fresh eyes for what they are and question them, you teach me to unlearn with mine.
I feel guilty when I breathe a sigh of relief when I drop you off at kindy. Yet I can’t wait to pick you up.
I lose my patience a little when I turn the tap on to wash your hands and it’s “too fast” then “too slow” then “too fast” and we’re late.
I feel awful when your hands find your ears because it’s all too much and I realise sometimes it’s my voice that’s too loud.
I won’t apologise because I’m proud of you, the world needs more of you, yet I still worry and think of you before everything we do.
And you’re rocked by it.
I’ve never been more alive since having you and never more exhausted.
I want to take the weight off you but i can only take your hand.
I will continue to do better, for you my love.
To the parents of beautiful highly sensitive ones.
I know it comes with challenges.
I’m there with you, and I see you there for them.